San Francisco For Better or Worse

One week from today I will be running the San Francisco Marathon. It will be my first marathon since the NYC Marathon almost 2 1/2 years ago. I'm excited but also very nervous. I had 7 good marathon experiences but the one really bad one, the NYC Marathon, was pretty bad. Then I trained to do the Newport Marathon twice but got injured both times and was unable to run it.

I've been running at least once a week with members of my Hood to Coast relay team and a few of them have made me nervous. I should say, I feel intimidated by the competitiveness of a few team members. They run more miles in a week than I probably do in two weeks. They log all of their runs in their running journals. They race regularly and also regularly place in the races they run. I, on the other hand, run 3-4 times a week but don't write down my distance or speed. I just feel pretty happy to be running again without any injury. I'm not going for any specific goal time. I just want to enjoy the race as much as anybody can enjoy a 26.2 mile race.

I put in a lot of hours doing long runs every weekend. In the past 7 Sundays I've run almost 140 miles. I also run each Tuesday and Thursday religiously and go to the gym 2-3 times a week. Do I run more than that? Only when my job allows. Do I do speed work and races? I've done two races but absolutely no speed work. I've travelled a fair bit in the last few months and it's hard to run in a different town, in different weather, and in a different time zone. Part of me feels guilty for not trying harder and being more driven. But that's the whole crux of the problem.

Obviously I'm somewhat driven or I wouldn't be preparing to run my 9th marathon but am I driven enough? Was the amount of work I put in good enough or will running this marathon be as miserable as the last? I just don't know the answer but I'm formulating a plan. Between now and next Sunday, I'm going to picture myself running the marathon with love. Oh, I know that sounds cheesy but listen: sometimes after a 20 mile run, I feel enormous love for my body. I feel lucky to be healthy. Most of all I feel like I could accomplish anything.